Welcome to another episode of Neurons Like Brandy. Apologies that the updates are becoming less frequent. The chapters are harder to update as they need more work, events need to change, character motivation oscilates and needs to be balanced. Whole swathes of text are being rewritten as you read this and it is way, way harder than I had first imagined.
The last chapter was told from Jocelyn's perspective and I am pretty happy with it. This episode, not so much, I've been agonising over it for about two weeks in between doing a couple of short road trips.
Things are moving along in the household but I am not entirely sure that they are moving along at the correct pace. Too fast maybe?
Anyway, as usual, if you have come here for the first time and are interested in reading a zombie novel. Go to the full index here.
5: Present
Dan and Phillip looked at each other as they stood behind the front door of the building adjacent to theirs. Both of them had crash helmets with visor,s even so Dan could make out Phillip’s eyes. They were gleaming.
Suited in heavy leather, lined with metal plating in the sleeves, Dan was already starting to sweat. Normally they would have had time to gear up properly and maybe put more padding on their legs but this was an emergency. The car that had crashed was being swarmed by zombies and there were at least 4 people still alive in the vehicle. Dan started to breathe heavily and the noise filled his helmet, he could still faintly hear the sound of Craig and Isaac on megaphones trying to draw enough attention away from the quarry in the wrecked car. Joshua came up behind them and tapped them on the shoulder and gave them the thumbs up. He and Oli would be the gate keepers; they would keep anything away from the door.
Dan turned and exaggeratedly nodded at Phillip and then they were out the door.
He felt his feet pounding across the concrete and instinctively down the steps he had been down tens of times already, he knew exactly where the cracked stone was on the fourth step from the bottom and exactly how to avoid it. His breath was now coming faster. Phillip moved in front of him and broke into a run. The car and the group of zombies surrounding it were less than 60 feet away but on top of that there were maybe 15 stragglers between there and the front gate.
Whooping, Dan swung his machete at the first zombie, the blade caught it in the neck and the force of the blow was enough to knock its head off. Dan aimed for the one just past it and took a swing at it with his nailed baseball bat. Blow reverberated through the base and into his arms the judder told him that a nail had pierced its skull and the creature sunk to its knees as he yanked the bat out.
After that it was a blur of shouting and violence, Dan only caught snippets of this as he scrambled closer to the car. A zombie grabbing his arm and him pushing it away; Phillip efficiently smashing an undead with his gauntleted hand and shattering its rotten jaw; Dan feeling like he was going to hyperventilate, his heart pounding; there being three survivors with the fourth being eaten and still screaming; grabbing the hand of one and running back to the house, being able to see Joshua waving at him; his feet running along the uneven grassy ground and almost stumbling; then being grabbed by something off to the left, obscured by his visor.
Dan hit the ground, shouting into his helmet, the noise making his ears feel like they were going to burst. He managed to flip onto his back; the form was clawing at his thick clothes. He got it into his line of sight as it bit down on his right forearm. Dan started to scream and felt a moment of relief as broke its teeth on the metal under the leather. He fished a blade from a holster on his hip and stabbed it through the eye. Not even scanning for the person he had been holding Dan started running again. He became aware of something running beside him, Dan realised he was weaponless, his bat discarded somewhere – he wasn’t sure whether he lost it in the fall or at the car - and the blade still in his attacker. I am going to die, Dan thought, great.
He glanced to his side getting ready to punch out but it was Phillip pumping his fist next to him, one hand holding his machete the other Dan’s bat.
At that point he became aware that there were two people about 10 feet ahead of him they were heading for the front gate of the house that Joshua and Oli were at. Survivors.
They got into the house and quickly scaled the stairs to the roof. Dan was vaguely aware of people shouting things but couldn’t make them out through the helmet.
From the roof they made their across an aluminium extension ladder which once everyone was across they pulled back onto their safe haven.
As soon as he was back on the flat surface of the building Dan sunk to the ground and put his back against the wall. His head was spinning like it always did after the adrenaline kick started running out, he felt like he needed to cry. His heart was pumping, like it was going to force itself out of his ribcage and strangle him.
He couldn't stop being scared. The rescue had been wrong, impossible, but they had made it. He looked down at his right arm and vomited into his mouth as he saw one errant tooth lodged into the jacket. He swallowed the acidic content back down and yanked his helmet off before frantically ripping off his body armour searching for wounds. He was burning up, sweating underneath his thick, lined coat that he desperately trying to claw off. That was a sign that he was infected that is how it started. Panicking, he stood up, someone came over and grabbed him helped him out of his coat. He pulled up the sleeves of the jumper he had on underneath and stared at the unblemished skin underneath.
Not a scratch.
Dan looked up to see Isaac standing next to him looking worried.
“Not a scratch.” Dan laughed almost hysterically and then sat down heavily.
He was alive.
Dan closed his eyes and slumped against the roof's walls knocking over an empty bucket that had been shifted there as they had made space for the celebratory feast. Dan calmed himself down by humming that same old tune: ‘…loved to steal…’
Slow down, he told himself, slow down.
He finally got his breathing and composure back and caught what was being said:
“- fucking yeah! Did you see that?” It was Phillip. “Clear across the fucking square and back!”
A hand came down on his shoulder, this time it was Joshua
“Sorry man didn't mean to scare you.” He said. “Are you okay? That looked pretty close there.”
Dan relaxed and nodded.
“Yeah, I'm fine.” Dan exhaled again, it felt good. “I thought I might have been bitten.”
“- I mean, sweet as! Did see me punching through that Camer's head?” Phillip was boasting now, Dan could hear in the tone of his voice that he loved it.
“Nah, you're fine.” Joshua said to Dan. “Your armour will always see you through”
“Yeah, I guess.” Dan said a little weakly, his head telling him that it hadn’t helped Denny.
“I know just how you feel man, it's almost like you feel like you shouldn't be alive.” Joshua patted Dan on the shoulder and then walked off leaving him to look across the roof at the crowd.
Phillip was standing, fully suited bar the helmet and yelling enthusiastically at Orfax and Oli.
The commotion had caused Michael to emerge from his hut, normally he would have asked for people to be quiet so as not to scare all of the birds away, but instead his curiosity lay with what had everyone else's attention. The two new people who had made it back into their building.
They sat at the table looking dazed and tired while they talked quietly to Caryn and Alison. In turn they were being proffered some food and a glass of some kind of alcohol.
The first was a guy, maybe late twenties with short, blond, hair a little under 6 foot, skinny and not wearing enough protection for someone traveling the roads. The second was a girl, maybe early twenties, even younger perhaps, jet black hair that framed her face, a little chubby but she had a pretty face, dressed almost identically to the guy.
Dan looked around at the single males in the group and noted that, Isaac and Oli specifically had a hungry look in their eyes.
Dan couldn't blame them, some of them probably hadn't been laid in ages and the potential for one could do funny things to people's heads.
He looked back at Phillip, who was still gesticulating wildly as he talked.
The boasting was winding down, Phillip seemed to have come down a little and Dan saw him glance in their direction. He caught Phillip's glance at the girl too, it was like a snapshot, a moment Dan believed only he had seen. The look that Phillip gave the girl was akin to lust but not quite. It was as if Phillip was physically assessing her, giving her some kind of run down. The look was only for a fleeting second but it was there.
In that moment, Dan hated Phillip; the hatred lasted as long as the glance. Dan felt a little embarrassed, but that second of pure hatred lodged itself somewhere in his guts, and Dan couldn't shake it.
Jay and Maria appeared and approached the couple, Dan wondered if the two arrivals were actually a couple, if all this attention from the males in the block of flats was futile.
As he stared at them he noticed the couple's quick exchange, they nodded as if akin with each other's movements/moods, a couple maybe or family but they didn’t seem alike. Dan closed his eyes again; listening to the pulsing of the blood in his head slow further he hummed the tune in his head again.
He opened his eyes groggily, he was felt a little chill around his body and realised that he had fallen asleep. His body ached from the awkward position it had been in. The sun was no longer fully in the sky and the shadows were growing longer.
Almost everyone was now sitting around the table the only omissions were the new girl, Maria and Michael who were nowhere to be seen.
Dan's muscles and bones groaned as he got up shakily, and made it to a seat between Alison and Oli; they were all listening to the new guy.
“-London's fucked.” Dan noted that he spoke with a Midland's accent the 'fucked' was pronounced 'fuhcked'. “We only went as far as the outskirts before we started seeing literally thousands of them. If there is anything there, you wouldn't want to know as you'd probably end up dead.”
“Where else have you been?” This was from Phillip.
“Well we tried Coventry first, there was supposed to be a huge defense there, like a small city with loads of food and water and plenty of guns. But we lost our way and our half of the convoy ended up fuck knows where. Once we got back on track we headed south for Devon. Ended up in Newquay. We lost almost everyone.”
He stopped for a minute, his mood while talking had been animated; now it had dropped and he looked like he was going to start crying.
“Look, it has been crazy afternoon.” Caryn interjected. “You've been through a lot maybe you should get some rest and we'll bother you with our questions tomorrow.”
She shifted a glance at Phillip for approval.
Phillip shrugged:
“Yeah it has been pretty crazy.” Phillip said. “How long have you been on the road?”
“I don't know, this time was maybe about four weeks, maybe longer.” The visitor looked visibly relieved. “Haven't had decent kip in longer.”
“I'll show you where you and your sister will be staying.” Caryn got out of her seat and ushered the newcomer to follow.
“Thanks, I really appreciate this.” He said as they walked away.
Dan didn't catch the rest of the conversation.
“How long was I out for?” Dan asked.
“Oh hey, sleepy head.” Alison turned and smiled at him. “You've been out for about three or four hours. You looked too peaceful to move.”
“What did I miss?”
“Apparently there was a community just outside of Newquay for the last eight months that Andy and his sister used to live there but they ran out of supplies so they ended up heading this way.”
“And they happened on us?” Dan observed. “That was lucky.”
“Poor guy, it is like he has lost everyone.” Alison said, Dan could see Alison's eyes go watery.
“Yeah that sucks.” Phillip started up almost sarcastically.
There was an uncomfortable pause while Alison composed herself, and Dan felt a hint of anger run through him that he hadn’t seen her act that way when Denny died.
“So what about the girl?” Dan asked, from the corner of his eye he saw someone turn to look at him as he said that.
“What about her?” Alison replied, sounding less interested.
“What's her name?” Dan turned away from Alison to look at the person staring in their direction. It was Jo; she could hear what they were saying despite the rest of the people talking around them. Dan didn't like the look on her face.
“Lain, or something.” Alison nudged her boyfriend to pass her a drink. “Must be short for something, who would call their child something stupid like that.”
“Dunno,” Phil B interjected. “Knew this guy I went to school with, his name was Richard Head. Poor guy got called Dickhead for almost all of school, even some of the teachers used to too.”
Craig perked up across from his brother.
“You talking about Rich?”
Phil B nodded.
“He was in the same class as me, used to help me with my maths. Nicest guy ever.”
“That's nothing.” Orfax chimed out. “My great Uncle on my mother's side was called Blue Murder.”
Jo was still looking at Dan and him at her.
“Fuck off.” Oli laughed. “No way that could even be remotely true.”
“If I had my passport and stuff I could prove to you what my Mother's maiden name was, and that was Murder.”
Dan didn't know how to look away now, it was like Jo had slapped him with a glove and he could no longer back out of the challenge.
“So if your mum had been your dad.” Craig pointed out. “You would have been Dick Murder?”
People started laughing. Not Jo though, she kept staring at Dan.
“Yeh, pretty much.” Orfax paused. “Shit, I wish my mum had been my dad. That would have been great.”
“Who wants cheap whiskey?” Dan heard Phillip push his seat back from the table and stand up. This invite was greeted by groans. “C'mon, Tesco's finest.”
“Count me out I'm going to bed.” Jay said.
“I'm up for it.” Jocelyn offered.
Jo had placed her hand on the table in front of her, Dan managed to look down at it, the hand was a fist, the knuckles white.
“So do you like her then?” Jo broke their silence.
“Great that makes it a party!” Phillip cackled.
“What?” Dan frowned.
“What about the rest of you?” Phillip asked. “Say now and I'll bring enough mixer and whiskey from downstairs.”
“Lane,” she rolled the word round her mouth like she was going to spit. “What do you think of her?”
Dan shrugged.
“Don't know her.”
“What about you Dan?” Phillip asked.
“What about me?” Dan snapped at Phillip.
“Do you want whiskey you moody cunt?” Phillip laughed.
“What? Yes.” Dan then asked Jo. “Why are you being like this?”
Jo shrugged then turned to Orfax, still looking at Dan, she licked the bottom of her boyfriend's ear.
Dan heard himself saying 'fuck this', then he got up and headed for the door to downstairs, before opening it he glanced back at the group, the only one watching was Jo, no one had even noticed his outburst. Dan wondered if he had said anything at all. Jo watched him open the door, he stared right back at her, maybe it was the light of the candles but her facial expression seemed to flit between guilty and accusatory.
Shaking his head he walked down into the dimly lit stair ways and towards his room.
He got to the apartment's front door when he heard Phillip call him.
“Mate, off to bed?” Phillip was closed in so that he cast a shadow over Dan's shoulders.
“Yeah I could do with an early night.” Dan managed to turn and smile.
“Well in that case have a half on me.” Phillip put down the carrier bags he had in each hand and then took out a 35cl bottle of own brand whiskey.
“No, it's okay.”
“Take it, looks like you need it.”
Without saying anything Dan took it and went into his flat.
“Sleep well.” Phillip called out after him.
Dan shuffled into his room and sat down on his bed, the springs creaking slightly under his weight. He unscrewed the cap on the bottle and took a quick swig of the liquid, it felt like fire as it passed his lips and down his throat. He took another, longer drink, then let it swirl in his mouth to let the aftertaste sting his gums.
For a few seconds, just before his third taste of the cheap scotch, Dan felt utterly alone. Like the first night without Nufonia next to him. He shivered, and then felt like crying. That first night after he had handed her over to the nurse, had been the first time he'd prayed in 7 years. He looked back at that night and was embarrassed by the person he'd been. After years of abject atheism, he'd felt the need to commune with God, to look for answers as to why it had happened to him.
Unsurprisingly, God hadn't been particularly forthcoming with responses.
As the fourth gulp passed his lips, Dan remembered a story Jocelyn had told him about old people and a nuclear holocaust and wondered if drinking too much whiskey could make your teeth fall out.
“I am alone.” He said miserably after the eighth visit to Whiskey well.
The next thing he knew he was lying on his back, stripped to his waist underneath his duvet cover. His mind spun from still being drunk as he tried to remember what happened. His hand swept to his right and found the cold glass of the bottle he lifted it slowly. Empty and useless.
“Well there’s an analogy for you.” He whispered, smiling a little at his crap joke.
He looked around the room and noticed an anomaly, the curtains were open and the moonlight was streaming through the windows. When he'd come in the curtains had been closed. Dan tried to think whether he had opened them whilst drinking.
Then he saw movement in the far end of the room, from the chair that was in the place where the television had been before the end of the world.
“Jo?”
The shape passed through the moonlight from the window furthest from him, the build was female, no dreads and her build was larger than Jo's.
“Hey, sleepy-head.” It was Alison.
“Hey,” Dan said. “What’s up?”
“Not much, just been drinking.” She slurred and started giggling. “Yeah, got to love the whiskey.”
She was now standing in the light from the window nearest to his bed.
“Umm, what are you doing in my room?”
“Phil's gone to bed, and I fancied a chat” She replied.
As she stood in the light her stance changed, as if she were trying to strike a pose.
“What did you want to talk about?” Dan adjusted himself on his bed, the duvet scratching against his stomach.
“Nothing really.” Alison's pose swayed as she stood, she was obviously quite wasted. “Just bored and everyone else is asleep.”
“So was I.” Dan said, now confused.
Alison paused; he could tell she wasn't certain where to go from here. Then she flipped her head back and laughed quietly.
“You're awake now.”
“Yeah, I am.” Dan smiled uncertainly.
Alison walked over to him and sat down on the side of his mattress.
“What did you want to talk about?” Dan repeated.
“You.” Alison said reaching out to touch his calf and shake it. Dan managed not to flinch “You went to bed pretty early.”
“Yeah, I was up pretty late last night talking to Caryn.” Dan said.
He couldn't see it, but he knew from the way she had aligned her shoulders she had an eyebrow cocked.
“Really?” She said mockingly. “And what did you 'talk' about?”
“It isn't like that; we are friends, like you and me.” Alison's hand hadn't left his calf.
“Sure, sure.” Alison's hand slid up to his knee. “Just like you and me.”
“What are you doing Alison?” Dan repeated.
“What? Nothing, just being friendly.”
“Of course.” The hand stayed on his knee.
“I just wanted to tell you that I'm scared too.” Alison whispered.
Dan pulled his leg out from under her and got out of the bed, something bad was going to happen if he didn't get out of there.
“I get so afraid...” She faltered as he started to walk away.
Then she was directly behind him pushing him into the corner. She was bigger and heavier than him so Dan hadn't stood much of a chance. She stood with either arm blocking him into the corner, his eyes now accustomed to the dark Dan could see her eyes staring intently into his.
“I just wanted to tell you, you are special” She breathed whiskey in his face.
“I think we all are.” He lied. “Look if you are scared why don't you talk to Phil about it, I'm sure he would understand. He seems like a great guy-
“Do you think I'm coming on to you?”
Yes, yes I do. Dan thought.
“No, of course not.” Dan attempted a laugh. “We are just friends.”
“God,” she pulled away and went to the door of his room and made to leave. “All I wanted to do is talk! It has been so hard for me, me! I lost my whole family, now all I have are you guys! I just wanted people to understand.”
The whisper was gone and she was shouting, probably loud enough to wake up Isaac. She paused giving Dan a chance.
“I'm sorry Alison.” Dan wondering how crazy Alison was, and whether she had always been this crazy or if it had only started recently.
He didn't get much time to think as she cleared the space between them and kissed him on the lips, trying to force her tongue past his gritted teeth.
Dan tried to let go, if this girl wanted to try and fuck up her relationship, let her, he had had no part in this, he could just let it happen.
But, he couldn't, it didn't feel right.
She broke the kiss, her breathing was heavy now.
“Just a friendly goodnight kiss.” She said, leaning in for another.
“Okay,” Dan pulled himself clear of her grip. “Goodnight then.”
“What's the matter?” She said her focus slipped, and she started to frown. Dan had seen that look on drunk people, the look that occurs when the world starts to spin faster all of a sudden. “Am I not good enough?”
“No, no it isn't that.” Dan said.
“Oh my God, you hate me don't you?” Tears emerged, trickling down her cheeks.
“What? No, I never said that.” Dan said exasperatedly. “Look maybe you should go. It seems like you and Phil really need to-
“Oh fuck it, fuck it.” She swore. “You hate me, you'll fuck that whore, but I'm not good enough, is that it?”
“No I never said that. Look Alison if you want to talk about stuff tomorrow when you are sober-
“WHO gives a fuck about sober?” Alison was now bawling. “You don't know what it’s like to be raped!”
“Wha-
“You must think I'm such an idiot.” She sobbed, now lying against the wall wiping tears from her eyes.
“I never said-
“All this time, and no one understands. No one fucking understands.”
“Alison, I'm tired. You're tired.” Dan tried to reason with her. “I don't understand why you are telling me this.”
“Because you are special.” She sniffled.
“Well I think that Phil is pretty special too, I'm sure he'd listen and try and help-
“Why do you always keep bringing up Phil?” She screamed back at him.
“What's going on?” Dan sighed with relief as Isaac appeared at his bedroom door looking sleepy.
“Nothing.” Dan said, gesturing past Alison.
Alison looked at Isaac then at Dan, the tears had evaporated with the only evidence being the mascara streaks down her round cheeks.
“I better go.” She said, dabbing her nose and sounding sober.
She didn't wait for Isaac to get out of the way and barged straight into him.
“What the hell.” Isaac managed as she bounced him out of the way.
Dan collapsed onto his bed.
“What was that all about?” Isaac asked. “I heard a bit of shouting and then crying...”
“Don't ask.” Dan tittered, feeling a little giddy. “I'm not sure I even know.”
No comments:
Post a Comment